Don't let the name of my pages run you away if you aren't a mother. It could just as easily say "Dads", "Sisters", "Brothers", "Children" ..... no matter what you are to an addict .... you suffer along with them. It just happens that I'm a mother.
My name is Vicki, or as some people call me, Treasure. Writing really isn't one of my strong points, and that's one reason why I hesitated in starting these pages before now. But ... the more I talked to people, I realized that maybe, just maybe, by doing this, I could get some peace and satisfaction within myself, and maybe at the same time, I could help someone else.
I'm certainly not an authority on the subjects I plan to cover in this site, but sometimes you don't have to be an authority, you just have to have "lived it" ... and I certainly have. My daughter was an addict and my brother is still in active addiction. I've watched the process of addiction over many years now. I've watched what it's done to them, and I've watched how it's destroyed our family. And ..... most of all, I've lived the horror of what it's done to me especially, as the mother of an addict.
I hope that in some way, I can help someone else through my experiences. And maybe, if I can't actually help you, maybe I can give you comfort in knowing .... that you aren't alone in this nightmare world called drug addiction.
Come along with me on this journey through addiction and maybe together, we can help each other!
It's A Long Walk Back To Forever . . . . .
The other night, I was checking out in a local grocery store and was listening as the cashier chatted with one of her friends that was in the line behind me. Both girls appeared to be 19 - 20 years old and the entire topic of their conversation was about getting "blown away" later that night.
I've always wondered why young people referred to the high they achieved from alcohol or drugs, as getting "blown away" so I took a chance and looked up the word "blown" in the dictionary. Here's what I found:
| blow/blown: (1) to move with speed or force, (2) to talk windily, (3) to move or be carried by, or as if by wind, (4) to melt when overloaded (as an electric fuse), (5) to shatter, burst, or destroy by explosion, (6) to spend (money) recklessly, (7) to rupture by too much pressure, (8) to lose one's composure, (9) to become violently angry, (10) to go crazy, (11) to overwhelm with wonder or bafflement, (12) to inform against. |
After reading Mr. Webster's definition, I began to wonder if he had fathered a chemically dependent teenager himself.
I wanted so badly to say to these young girls . . . . that if they only knew what I knew, or had seen what I had seen, then maybe they wouldn't be so overwhelmed with the desire to get "blown away" .... yet knowing full well that it wouldn't matter to them what I had experienced, they could not understand the full impact of the devastation that can come from chemical abuse, until they had experienced it themselves.
So, I paid for my groceries and left the store, feeling a helpless type of burden for these young girls ..... young girls that I didn't even know .... for you see .... this was the night before Thanksgiving. My own young daughter, age 17 wouldn't be spending Thanksgiving with us because this very day, she had been released from a six week rehabilitation program of chemical dependency and was entered into a three month halfway house program.
The long walk back to forever had just begun . . . . .
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